Is your spouse addicted to alcohol?
If so, you are wrestling with lots of tough questions.
Should I divorce my spouse? Will their alcoholism destroy our family or lead to physical abuse? What can I do to protect myself and my kids?
People with alcohol use disorders often need professional support. Their condition—and their conduct—can put a lot of strain on a marriage. The National Library of Medicine cites a study finding that the divorce rate is significantly higher for couples if one of them is a heavy drinker. As a Charleston divorce mediation lawyer, I have put together a resource guide that includes key things to know if you are going through a divorce with an alcoholic in South Carolina.
You Must Protect Your Safety, Emotional Health, and Overall Well-Being
As a starting point, it is important to emphasize that your safety, health, and overall well-being matter. When considering divorce—especially from an alcoholic spouse—your primary focus should be on doing what is best for yourself, family, and future.
Alcoholism is a disease that does far more than merely affect the individual, it changes the entire family dynamic. Unfortunately, it can lead to some very stressful, unpredictable, and sometimes even dangerous situations. This is a reality that many people with alcoholic partners must deal with.
It is crucial to establish boundaries that protect you and your children (if you have any). Depending on the specific circumstances, you may need to move to a safer environment, seek support from friends and family, or engage with a therapist who understands the complexities of addiction.
Know Your Rights Under South Carolina Law: Habitual Drunkenness is Grounds for Divorce
There are five different grounds for divorce in South Carolina—four fault-based grounds and one no-fault ground. Under South Carolina Code § 20-3-10(4), habitual drunkenness is a ground for a fault-based divorce.
Most divorce in South Carolina are finalized on no-fault grounds—which requires at least one year of separation between the spouses.
However, if your spouse is habitually drunk, you may be able to get an immediate fault-based divorce without any required period of separation.
Just because you can get a fault-based divorce doesn’t mean you have to. Even for those with alcoholic spouses, there are still often advantages to seeking a low conflict no-fault divorce. Mediation can be a great tool to help work towards a resolution in these cases.
The Divorce Process with an Alcoholic in South Carolina
Every divorce is unique. When alcoholism is involved, it can add a layer of complexity to the process. Depending on the severity of the addiction and its impact on your marriage, the divorce process can vary. In some cases, you and your spouse may be able to negotiate a settlement through mediation and move on without dwelling too much on the alcohol abuse. In other cases, you may end up facing challenges—such as disputes over custody or finances—that are exacerbated by the erratic behavior that is so often associated with alcoholism.
If you and your spouse share young kids or teenagers, his or her alcoholism will always be a serious matter for concern. You need to work out a custody and visitation arrangement that prioritizes your children’s safety. A parent’s alcohol use disorder has a major impact on their ability to prove care for a child.
Helping Your Alcoholic Spouse Get Support May Be in Your Best Interests
While you are navigating the difficult decision to divorce, it may also be the most compassionate (and strategic) option to encourage your spouse to seek help for their alcoholism. Of course, this does not mean you are responsible for their recovery—far from it. Still, trying to help to facilitate access to resources like addiction counseling or support groups can be beneficial. Supporting your spouse in getting help can positively affect the divorce process too.
For example, if your spouse begins to address their addiction, it could lead to a more amicable divorce settlement negotiation process and to a healthier co-parenting arrangement—assuming there are children involved. Remember, your ultimate goal is to transition to a new chapter in your life on positive terms. That is why divorce mediation can be a useful tool, even if you are ending a marriage with an alcoholic.
Get Help From Our Divorce Mediator in Charleston Today
At Charleston Divorce Mediators, LLC, we are committed to helping people solve problems and secure their future. If you have questions about the process for divorcing an alcoholic, our team is here as a resource. Schedule your confidential appointment today. From our Charleston office, we provide solutions-focused divorce mediation services throughout South Carolina.
About Catherine Marra
Catherine Marra is a nationally certified Divorce Mediator with over 30 years of experience in Family Law, including 20 years in private practice and 10 years as a Family Court Magistrate. She uses her knowledge and experience to guide couples in negotiating divorce settlements so they can save money, complete the divorce process quicker, and get better outcomes than they would at trial.